If you’ve ever struggled with anxiety, I bet you’ve heard it a million times: “Just relax!” It’s well-meaning advice, but if only it were that simple, right?

For me, anxiety isn’t something I can just switch off. It’s not about lacking willpower or not wanting to feel a calmness. The racing thoughts and lethargic feeling and tension in my body, can present a clear message. That a sense of being overwhelmed can show up out of nowhere and  sometimes without any clear reason. It’s annoying, exhausting, and, if I’m honest, pretty isolating too.

I used to wonder why strategies that seemed to work for others didn’t work for me. Taking deep breaths, counting to ten, even trying to “think positive”—none of them felt like enough when my anxiety took over. It can feel defeating when simple tips just don’t cut it.

What I’ve learned through my own healing journey is that anxiety isn’t just a mental battle. It lives in my body, my beliefs, and even in those old stories I tell myself. It’s woven into experiences I’ve picked up over time, especially ones involving trauma or big life transitions. No quick fix is going to untangle all that in one go.

If you resonate with any of this, I just want you to know you’re not alone. There’s nothing “broken” about you if you can’t snap out of anxiety on demand. Healing is often a layered, gentle process, and it usually requires more than surface-level techniques.

Sometimes, the most helpful first step is simply acknowledging how tough it is—and giving myself  the permission to be patient. No more pressure to “just relax”; I deserve deeper support and real, lasting relief.